Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Two obese Pattys...

McDonalds, in their life-long quest to make everything and everyone bigger, is now giving away Hummers with every Happy Meal.

No. I don't mean that kind of hummer. I mean little metal and plastic models of GM's gas-guzzling behemoth. So now they are not only teaching kids how not to chose the right foods, but they're also lending a hand in showing them how to lay waste to the planet and keep gas prices going up, up and up.

Fuck McDonalds. And fuck Hummers. That goes for the H2 and the mini-hummer and any other gigantic V8 monstrosity which can't fit into an oversized parking space.

If you need a ladder to get into your car you better be a truck driver. And I mean a real truck, with 18 wheels. Not a mini-tank which you can't navigate worth a shit and which you inexplicably SLOW DOWN TO A CRAWL to go over a tiny little bump in a parking lot. If you're going to drive an off-road vehicle and waste fuel efficiency by having the biggest, knobbiest, most friction producing mud bogging tires, then at least have the courtesy to bounce it over a few bumps instead of slamming on your brakes and causing me to spill my Chick-Fil-A nuggets on the floor.

Fuck.


3 comments:

Funky Smith said...

mcdonalds is nothing to me but America's public bathroom. yuck!

Phoooiee said...

I love the sign!!

lindsey said...

McDonald's is spending a fortune on proving how eco-friendly they are and not completely destroying the planet, now they come out with a promotion for a vehicle that is the exact opposite of the message they're trying to send.
Of course Hummer vehicles, especially Hummer limo are fascinating, but such promotion of two different spheres are not advisably.